Project-Blu 'G-Force' Blu-ray Review, By Nate Boss

G-Force

By: Nate Boss, 12.17.2009

The Movie Itself:
Project-Blu Points Bulletin (The PB PB)

Pro:
A kid friendly action flick that is most definitely better than Spy Kids.
Guinea pigs. Talking guinea pigs.
A fast moving film, over before you know it.

Con:
Tracy Morgan. Sounding like he always does.
A meandering storyline that isn't too cohesive.
Quite low replay value, or desire to replay.

Guinea Pigs.

Lovable furry little critters, with a variety of sub-breeds and hair designs. Good for family pets (that don't have dogs, that is) for adults or children. Messy little buggers, too, with the penchant to defecate and/or urinate anywhere in their pens/cages. With prominent front teeth, cute little claws, soda-can like tubular bodies, and the funniest damn voices and noise making abilities of nearly pet, the little South American delicacies haven't been very prominent in cinema.

Bedtime Stories changed all that. Bugsy, the bug-eyed squeaking little goofball, stole every scene he was in. He was an un-marketed family friendly success, so cute that families would want their own, yet no real products had been tied in to him. Linny from the Super Pets has more marketability (and a cute cape!!!), but since the demographic for the show is so focussed on children, it is hard to connect to the character. That, and that damn turtle is freaking creepy.

So, the director of the two National Treasure films produces (not directs, as that duty is taken by Hoyt H. Yeatman, Jr.) a film sure to attempt to cash-in on the fact that these little rodents finally have the chance at an audience. G-Force. Commando guinea pigs. Think G.I. Joe, but the G stands for Guinea, and the I stands for pIg.

Ben (Zach Galifianakis) and Marcie (Kelli Garner) are FBI agents who work with animals of all sorts, creating technology for them to perform tasks for the government. The all stars of the team? A trio of well trained guinea pigs named Darwin, Juarez, and Blaster (Sam Rockwell, Penelope Cruz, and Tracy Morgan, respectively), along with hacker mole Speckles (Nicolas Cage, his hair not a distraction for once), and their spy/fly.

After raiding the home of Leonard Saber (Bill Nighy) looking for evidence of wrongdoing, the crew face disgrace from taskforce director Will Arnett (the guy in nearly every awful SNL film), and are forced to retreat from their base of operations, landing in a pet store. There, with a neurotic hamster (Steve Buscemi), gung-ho fatty guinea pig Hurley (Jon Favreau), and trio of braindead mice, the group discover losses they never had to face before. The FBI may have shut the G-Force down, but they won't back down, and are out to stop Saber's plan for world domination/destruction!

I don't get why these shows just can't have animals of similar personalities. Darwin, Hurley, Juarez, and Blaster are all about as far apart as any could be. Darwin's straight forward, a leader type, much in the Duke mold, while Hurley is the reluctant hero, thrown into the mix without proper training. Juarez is the sexpot, the Cover Girl/Scarlett amalgamation with a bad accent, while Blaster is just a horrific racial stereotype from the one pig with any black fur. It's insulting, poorly written, and straight offensive, for more reasons than the fact that it's talentless Tracy Morgan.

I got a kick out of the Connor (Tyler Patrick Jones) character, who was much like Sid from Toy Story. He puts Blaster through constant torture, as well as tries to kill Hurley in the pet story. The situations he puts the pigs through aren't funny, by any means, and do amount to animal cruelty (I thought films for kids were supposed to preach against this sort of behavior!), but they do show the kind of child who does not need an animal. Guinea pigs are very warm and caring critters (so long as they get constant attention. Those who get ignored become closeted and fearful), and the children who get them are great examples of kids to not even let breathe on their own, let alone be responsible for the life of a pet. Maybe Bucky the hamster, as those things have a self-destruct mechanism in them, anyways, but still.

G-Force is a flawed movie, in that it doesn't appeal to both adults and kids. The target audience is the same who would ask their parents for guinea pigs once they finish the movie. The humor is all aimed at kids (with a few adult chuckles), the story so paper thin that adults will find themselves nodding off, even with the action scenes.

The idea is solid: kick ass guinea pigs. The execution of said idea, not so solid. G-Force had me anxious to view, but now that I have, I can't say if I'd want to again.
Rating: 5/10

The Presentation:
G-Force arrives on Blu-ray with an AVC MPEG-4 encode at 1080p that is pleasing to the eyes, but has one glaring flaw, namely, a hefty, hefty amount of digital noise, to the point that whites in eyes had a blue checkerboard pattern, as did Buster's white fur patch. The grain level for the film is soft, allowing a more three-dimensional feel (and the film has it, definitely). The picture is quite deep, with natural edges, no obvious DNR or alterations, but some occasional aliasing flutters. Minute detail is super strong, but not always crystal sharp. The details on the mini-PDA is superb. Skin tones run a hair orange (on the live action actors).

The highlight of this release has to be the fireworks segment. This scene is a bit of video demo material if ever there were one. Colors are on display in great array, with detail sharp to the tiniest spark and flicker. It's perfection, short lived perfection.

The audio for G-Force is a hair less than what I'd hoped for a film of this ilk, with a DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 mix that doesn't up the ante to match the video. Dialogue is clear, but sometimes is overpowered by the less than powerful other sound elements. The soundtrack (chock full of horrendous modern dance music) is less than loud, with the most obvious bass element, though it is not deep or hearty like it should be. We're talking about bass heavy music, with light bass. Movement is present, as is localization, though they are both fairly under-utilized in the mix.

Judged as a children's film, G-Force sounds utterly fantastic. But as a Bruckheimer action/adventure film full of car chases and some rampant battles, it's a bit of a mess.
Rating: 8/10 (video score: 8.8/10, audio score: 8.4/10)

The Extras:
G-Force may just be another kid's film, but it has a solid and respectable extras section, including a DVD copy to keep the young grubby fingers off the high def disc!

Cine-Explore
Blaster's Boot Camp
G-Force Mastermind
Bruckheimer Animated
Access Granted: Inside the Animation Lab
G-Farce: Bloopers
Deleted Scenes
Music Videos
DVD
Digital Copy
Disney Movie Rewards Code
D-Box
Rating: 6/10

Overall:
Perhaps wasted potential, perhaps aimed too low in the age scale, G-Force is a fun mess, but a mess nonetheless. Guinea pig commandos on screen ='s awesome, but with the strange themes, constant poop/fart jokes, and lack of attention to adult audiences makes this one a bit problematic. The Blu-ray isn't perfect, but it has a nice load of extras, as well as great video and quite good audio. Give this one a rent, and be prepared to buy it if you like it. I don't see much replay value here, but kids, you know how they are.
Rating: 7/10